OK, so new decisions have been made just this weekend. Tom and I are going to take a wedding "pause". I don't want to use the word "postpone" because, I don't know, it's just so loaded. And we are not postponing indefinitely, we just need more time to save and basically pay down our credit cards before wracking up a whole new set of bills (not debt, I do not intend to spend more than we can save [keep fingers crossed])
In an effort to make sense of this new idea, I did some googling on wedding pauses and sorry to say there aren't any! It did result in 2.79 million hits, although they all seemed to be about wedding photography/videography- oh well. Internal debate starts here: should I google 'postpone wedding' even though 1. we are not technically postponing 2. the loaded word implies such negative connotations about not only our wedding, but our relationship (ugh! so unfair) So curiosity wins out and really, no one can tell what I am googling, so I type it in and here is a synopsis of what I get: 'what to do when you have to cancel wedding for illness, sickness, death in the family, job loss, etc.' However, I did find a decent messageboard exploring the various reasons for postponing, including a few that seemed very practical to me and did shed some light/relief into my situation. It felt good to know that women are experiencing some of the same troubling issues with spending massive amounts of money on one-single-day in my life. Albeit that day is important and we will be making memories for years to come, but even though I am on a strict 10k budget...that's still 10-grand!
More importantly, I had a brief conversation with some older friends, and by that I mean, friends that I have that are 50 and over, and they really, truly scoffed at the idea that I was fretting over postponing the wedding, or more realistically, pushing the date back to allow for more time, more money and a better wedding all-around. As they p-shawed over my hesitations, a thought came into my head that was really the root reason of why this "postponement" has really gotten to me. That thought was: life never really turns out the way you want it to or rather they way you think it will turn out. And actually that's O.K., but sometimes, like with my wedding, I really wanted it to be the one thing that would go and happen and turn out the way that I had always wanted it to. I am not saying having my dream wedding laid out before me and all I have to do is step into the dress and off I go into wedding-wonderland. I mean, I really just wanted whatever we do to be surrounded with happiness, joy, excitement and love. I don't really care about chair sashes or monogrammed cocktail napkins, I am just sad that for reasons revealed in my previous post that our postponement, to me, signifies the lack of joy and support that other people have when planning their wedding.
OK- enough "Debbie Downer" talk here. I am excited to have a little more time (actually a lot) to get my head wrapped around exactly what type of wedding we will be having and to have more time to get all the money and bills situated. Tom and I are alike in many ways, but this one, major and fundamental, way we can always justify to ourselves purchases that make our day-to-day lives easier. For instance, a new king size bed, a 50 inch plasma tv, new clothes for work, an iphone, etc. Now that we have all of our daily needs met, it's time to start saving and paying things off. One way that I have devised to save money is to go without a car! WOA- I know! Big decision! But, we live in city limits in Pittsburgh, and I work only 5 or 6 miles away from home, AND bus transportation is pretty good in my area, so when I turn in my leased vehicle, I am not going to buy a car right away. Subsequently, this will save me about 5,500$! (I do plan to buy before winter hits, b/c I am not standing at a freezing bus stop, I just get too cold!)
Anywho- its exciting to be making the right decision with our money, b/c honey- we worked for it!
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